I’ve read some crazy conspiracy theories in my time, but I think the award for the most ridiculous one has to go to one I’ve recently heard about.
Apparently, there are people out there who believe that Nicholas Cage is an immortal vampire, and John Travolta is an immortal vampire hunter who has made it his life’s work to take Nicholas Cage down.
Just take a minute to let that sink in.
Even at a quick glance, the theory is absurd on many levels, but let’s just assume for a second that vampires and vampire hunters could exist.
I know what you’re thinking – who’s crazy now?
But weirder things have probably happened, so let’s just suspend our disbelief for a moment and get to the point where it all gets really crazy.
So, one morning, John Travolta, centuries old vampire hunter with one clear goal, wakes up and thinks:
“Screw it, I’m bored of hunting vampires. I’m going to be an actor.”
And off he trots to Hollywood and does just that.
Now that’s crazy.
But wait, it gets even stupider.
Nicholas Cage, centuries old vampire who has spent hundreds of years evading the wily hunter, sees him one day in a movie.
Now, this is surely his chance to disappear somewhere he won’t be found. But does he take it? No.
Instead he thinks:
“Wow, that looks like fun. I’m not going to run away. I’m going to go to Hollywood and do that too.”
You really have to wonder, if this was true, how either of those guys have lived so long.
And then comes the really fun part.
John Travolta, vampire hunter and Nicholas Cage, vampire, are cast together in a movie.
Now surely this is the part where one of them seizes the opportunity to end the other and skip off into the sunset.
Nope.
They form an unlikely truce and finish the movie, because hey, it’s all about the art of acting right?
And to think I once thought Twilight was far-fetched.
Please tell me I’m not the only one who thinks its bizarre beyond words that people out there actually believe this. Have you heard any really crazy conspiracy theories? Let me know in the comments 🙂
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kristin mccarthy
I dont even have words for this theory. #anythinggoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
Right?!
Life Loving
I haven’t heard this conspiracy before but it did make me smile. A bit out there though!
Debbie, My Random Musings
It definitely gave me a laugh 🙂
Modern Gypsy
I haven’t heard this one before, but it’s hilarious! I wonder how people made that one up!!
Debbie, My Random Musings
I think some people have way too much spare time haha!
Mackenzie Glanville
haha ummm really? That is crazy lol #anythinggoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
I know haha
Wendy
Haha hahah what on earth!!! This is just ridiculous, where did you hear this? Can’t stop laughing xx #anythinggoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
It’s mad isn’t it! It was on MSN of all places! In fairness they weren’t actually saying they believed it, it was a round up of crazy conspiracy theories x
Sadie
Can’t say I’ve heard this one, but it lost me at “vampire” I much prefer conspiracy theories that at least make you pause for a split second before you write them off!
#AnythingGoes
melissa abel
I think we have to assume the persons responsible have problems with mental heath in some way. A psychologist would have a feild day!
#anythinggoes
Oldhouseintheshires
Weird, oh weird. #anythinggoes
mummy here and there
There are some epic conspiracy theories out, does question what is going through their minds X #anythinggoes
Musings of a tired mummy...zzz...
Bonkers idea, maybe to do with their Italian (or is it actually Transylvanian?) heritage and the shape of their hairline?! #anythinggoes
Jaki
Ohhhhhkay!!! 😳😳😳🤣🤣 #AnythingGoes
Heather Burnett
Gotta say that I have never hear THAT one, but I have heard some strange ones about Travolta since he is into Scientology…Maybe the Nick Cage one stems from his interest in the New Orleans folklore?? I don’t know…I’m going to have to think on that! #anythinggoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
Yeah Scientology is pretty crazy in itself. I didn’t know about the New Orleans connection but that could explain how he got dragged in!
jeremy@thirstydaddy
I haven’t heard that one. I do think that its a bit crazy that Sam Elliot looks exactly the same as he did thirty years ago. maybe he is spreading this rumor to keep people off his path? #anythinggoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
Oh you could be onto something there 😉
Mummy Snowy Owl
No words at all!
#anythinggoes
MomOfTwoLittleGirls
Why those two? I mean Tom Cruise & Mel Gibson should surely have been cast in the roles of weird vampire & slayer. They are weird, where as John & Nick are cool guys! Stupider!
#anythinggoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
Haha good point!
Patricia Lynne aka Patricia Josephine
LOL It sounds like a fun story at the very least.
Debbie, My Random Musings
Haha yeah it certainly gave me a laugh 🙂
Silly Mummy
Oh I’d forgotten this one! I first heard it years ago and it made me laugh so much! I think it’s great. It’s not limited to this either. They reckon Nic Cage is a vampire because there are claims of pictures going back hundreds of years of people who look just like him. There are others who people claim the same about. There was a police chief people had this theory about too – I want to say in Sheffield, but I’m not sure about that. Oh, and donated blood doesn’t get used for transfusions – it’s for the vampires of the Masons and the Illuminati. Of course. I love conspiracy theorists. And I love Buffy. Therefore, vampire conspiracies are my favourite! #AnythingGoes
Debbie, My Random Musings
I love a good vampire conspiracy theory too – I mean it’s good to know that there’s a tiny possibility of becoming immortal and staying young and healthy right lol!
I just think this particular one is particularly bad because it just doesn’t make sense. Like if you’re going to start a conspiracy theory, at least make it vaguely plausible haha.